South Africans & Race - It's the Norm Here

Siphumelele Zondi

@SZondi

Recently I spoke to a mate who studied in China and then the UK when I was also at university there. We’ve both been back for the same amount of time and it seems as much as we love our home country, we realise that there’s that big struggle of race. The mate I am mentioning here is a white woman. She said to me, “In South Africa politics is in your face, race is in your face, inequalities that are a result of race are in your face.”

I am a black man and I realised in UK middle class societies that I found myself in, my race didn’t matter to a lot of people. I was once in a casual conversation with two women who were convinced I was British, they never mentioned my race but were trying to find ways to prove that I am in fact British and South African. These were white women. Their race is important because I am writing this in South Africa where race seems is the “thing” that people judge you on before they realise that you are South African, a good television producer, Zulu and are a generally nice guy. Yep you are black first in South Africa and as a result you have to predominantly interact with other black people and there will be certain perceptions made about you when people meet you for the first time, before you open your mouth.

Why are SA Women told to Compromise for Marriage?

Lindiwe Maphumulo

@lindymaphumulo

Women are shrinked everyday of their lives. As women, we’re made to think that marriage is the most important goal we should aspire to. Men, on the other hand, are told to have other dreams and ambitions like heading up organisations, becoming presidents and making millions. When will we, as women, live a good life without settling for less and limiting ourselves?

My friend and I were having a discussion about this the other day. She was saying that it would be fascinating if a woman was hit on by a guy and then declined, but not just with a simple no but gave a thorough list of reasons of her decision. One of the reasons she could give is that she would like to get a career going and make her own money. My friend and I were thinking that in the society we live in, this woman would be called a gold digger and other names just because of her goals.

We discussed this to a point where a man who had been eaves-dropping decided to join in and turned it to a huge debate. He mentioned that he would have a problem with a woman who can do things for herself, he would feel that he isn’t needed.